oh my.

to all of my love ones.
thank you so much for all the birthday wishes.
i haven't had credit to reply and there were too many of them.
i'll reply as soon as possible.


thanks to baby for a great night.
and to everyone who was at euphoria tonight.
god, i love you.
♥



damnit, i'm tired.
ehehe
oh and not forgetting.
my beautiful parents.
i couldn't ask for anything more.
thanks for the present and the very much, tolerence to sent me to euphoria themselves.
and also picking me up.
i love the fact that i have an on-going very steady,open relationship with my mom.
hahahahhahahahaha.


sorry, i got no photos.
i was having too much fun.
ehehe

bada bing

you are all bark and no bite.
you talk like you're all big.
but come to think about it, you started the whole bitching people through blog and shit.
i'm just entertaining myself by just going with the flow.
it's really sad to have find out, that i'm causing such a big disturbance in your life or as you say, pain in the ass.
hahaha.
but it does not matter.
action speaks louder than words.
you want to be real mature about this.
then at least, have the decency to solve this straight to my face.
rather than bitching about me to your laptop and your friends.
i'm making things so easy and none of complications.
cause i'm not even looking for a fight.
just.
like you said.
let's be all mature.
hahhahaha.


meet me up, call me.
when you're all grown.
i'm satisfied enough to say that i've actually did my part.
i actually entertain this by going to you and actually have an inch of courtesy to solve this.
but if i don't see the effort for you saying all your 6 paragraphs words (or is it more?) to my face and have the courtesy to solve this like adults.
then so much for you being all mature, right?
okay honey.
we'll watch and see.
again, i have no rush of anger running through my vains, no tears in my eyes.
just a yawn and a growl in my stomach.
i better go eat.



oh, by the way.
i miss you azim.
and you too, eda.
damn.
:D

sickening people

it's honestly pleasuring watching you 'hurt' me

it's so pointless.

it's actually entertaining

hahahaa, sorry lh aku tk selalu keep tab pasal kau

sorry ah

i'm not obsessed like you are kan.

hahahha

i had to found out about this pathetic bitch by some friend calling me, telling me all about it.

we talked how, lame and pathetic this girl was for like 5 minutes.

then we got over it.

i decided to let everything go next year.

kau tu, setakat dh tumbuh tetek.

dh budget matured ah

apa bodoh kau nie.

hahahahhaa

for half a second, i did thought of many ways of sabotaging this bitch down.

things that i can actually do and made it happen

however, i came back to my senses when i realized she's not up to any standards to even worth, sabotaging.

ahhahahaha

also

i just decided.

to go on with my life.

hahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahha

but then we'll never know right.

i might just actually changed my mind for entertaining purposes.

hahaha

if you actually have any self-respect left.

i highly doubt you don't anymore.

but might as well say this

grow up bitch.

hahha

but don't worry, i know this girl won't stop proving to us the level of stupidity that she has to deal with .

so i'm expecting something in return.

so you can go on with your lousy words.

i'll end mine, here.

i'm writing this post with a yawn.

p/s: me and my boyfriend are better than ever.

thank you for your endless concern.

ehehhehe

it's over

i feel like this bigg anger flowing through my everything right now.
i want so badly to let this go
i just,
don't wanna feel this way
i just wanna be happy again
i want things to be like the old way again
im angry and i cant show it
im sad and i cant talk about it
i feel unappreciated and i cant do anything about it
im confused and pratically lost my way right now.
im so frustrated i could just blow my head off
i dont know where i am
i dont know what's right or what's wrong anymore
i now, can't tell the difference anymore

die

i need to rest my head

crying is giving me a headache.

you

it's 5:12 am.

and i'm still up

he's going to be so mad if he knows this.

baby

i know we've been arguing

fighting

contemplating

and trying so hard to make things work

and i know i have not make things easy for you

i feel this urge to just say whatever is on my mind right now.

to be frank, this feeling that i put forth for you, this whole degree of respect i sees in you, and how you gave me this love shit a whole new meaning

and without you even knowing it

how deeply i care for you

that sometimes,

it hurts

beyond words.

sometimes you do things.

things that you don't even know how deeply it hurts me sometimes.

like how you beautifully speak and then sound arrogant about it later

how you're easily forgetting me sometimes

or how you say things and don't mean it

or when you promised me something but never really put action into it

or how you stare at me when you're mad.

eyes, full of anger.

your words, goes without thinking

and how after that i would just shattered into million pieces.

fuck, i'm way too fragile for this.

it still amazes me what a powerful influence you have towards me

it's completely beyond my control now.

you'll never know how incredibly useless i feel when i'm standing beside you

cause that's when my body feels so completely empty

since i've given everything at that precise moment.

ah shit.

i swear,

i swear, i really tried my very best to not make this blog sound cheesy

he he he

azim k♥

i would technically give my all to sleep with Nate Archibald and Chuck Bass

O.O

well anyways

i've noticed

how annoying it is that all of my recent blog has been completely depressing -.-

but i'm through it now

i'm done fighting

contemplating

arguing

and being confused about everything

he said, he'll do anything to keep me

so i should just stop worrying and how i'm constantly thinking

that i could almost swore i could feel blood was about to come out from my ear

aahhha

ok, i watched too much trueblood.

-.-

anyway, because when i actually do all of those things

i would just automatically stop embracing the greatness for being here in the first place

and by not even realizing it

i forgot the main reason why i'm here with him

simply, cause i love him

love him for who he is

and who he wants to be

so i might as well just let

everything go

mommy said, everything comes and go

so i'm prepared

but then, i hate jinx-ing it

it's getting late but

i honestly couldn't sleep

my skin is getting so dry lately

thanks to all the sleepless night and lack of water drinking

pppuukkkkkkiiii

oh i am still currently sick.

yes, still am

i hate this

it's fucking annoying

okay i better get to sleep

this blog is getting crappy

hahahha

mwah.

♥